Saturday, July 23, 2016

After Love #Prolog

#PROLOG

Even if my heart stops,
Just like this,
I don’t think it will hurt,
Please do something,
Give me some treatment,
If I keep going like this,
All I will get is a broken heart
In this bruised chest

Soon, without me even realizing,
Tears stream down my face
I don’t wa...

Tiba-tiba suara Kim Feel semakin menjauh. Hanya sayup-sayup suara itu kedengaran keluar dari speaker headphoneku yang tadinya elok melekap di telinga tetapi kini sekadar tergantung di leher.

Again, lagu tu lagi.”

Aku memandang ke arah insan yang bersuara itu. Sudah tentu. Siapa lagi yang berani menggangguku di waktu-waktu begini.

“Nak apa?” aku sekadar bertanya. Malas mahu membalas kata-katanya sebentar tadi yang aku tahu pasti akan berakhir dengan debat berpanjangan yang mana kesudahannya aku yang perlu mengalah dan menukar tajuk. Butang ‘stop’ MP3 aku tekan. Ini bukanlah kali pertama Amir menunjukkan rasa tidak puas hatinya terhadap tabiat baru aku yang satu ini, yang bermula sejak beberapa bulan yang lalu.

“Tak ada apa. Ternampak kau, dan terasa nak tegur.”

Wajah Amir aku renung.

Bukan perkara luar biasa jika dia datang menegur. Amir Fairuz merupakan antara sahabatku yang paling rapat. Sejujurnya, dialah satu-satunya sahabatku yang paling rapat selain Nuril Nuha. Sahabat yang tahu kisah aku, jatuh bangun aku, pasang surutnya aku, segala pahit manis aku.

Memandang Amir hari ini, hatiku jadi lemah lagi. Sebak, tapi cuba kutahan. Amir tak bersalah.

“Kenapa?” Amir bertanya. Mungkin terkesan perubahan di raut wajah aku.

“Tak ada apa. Terharu tiba-tiba. Macam dah lama kau tak ‘ter’tegur aku.” Aku melawak. Senyuman di bibir cuba kumaniskan sebaik mungkin.

Amir tergelak kecil.

“Masing-masing busy. Final year la katakan. Kau busy dengan final project kau, aku dengan projek aku. Itu belum kita kira aktiviti persatuan yang tak terkejar tu lagi. Nasib baik la banyak yang junior dah take over.”

Amir terdiam seketika.

“Kau okey?” aku mengalihkan pandangan dari tasik di hadapan, dan wajahnya kupandang. Aku okey?

“Aku nampak macam tak okey ke?” soalannya kubalas juga dengan soalan.

Well, lagu tu. Bila kau dah masuk mode ‘In-listening-to-Like-Being-Shot-on-replay’ means kau completely not okay.” Amir membalas pandanganku penuh makna.

It is not on replay, kebetulan pula tengah turn lagu tu tadi. I wasn’t putting it on replay. I’ve stop doing so. Jangan risau.” Sekali lagi, senyuman paling manis cuba aku pamirkan. Aku okey. Aku dah okey.

“In...”

“Mir, kau free? Temankan aku makan? Tiba-tiba aku rasa macam nak makan ABC.” Aku memotong sebelum sempat Amir berkata apa-apa, cuba mengalih arah perbualan kami. Aku tahu apa yang cuba Amir katakan, aku tahu ke mana hala tuju perbualan ini jika dibiarkan, tetapi aku tidak mampu memenuhi hajat hati sahabat disebelahku ini untuk membicarakan sesuatu yang cuba aku lupakan.

Mujurlah Amir memahami kemahuan aku itu. Dia mengeluh kecil sebelum bersetuju untuk menemaniku ke kafeteria.

*****

“Nuril.” Aku memanggil lembut. Buku ditangan aku tutup. Sudah berulang kali aku mengulang baca baris yang sama. Fokusku bukan pada buku tersebut.

“Petang tadi aku jumpa Amir.” perlahan suaraku berkata.

Pantas Nuril mengangkat pandangannya dari komputer riba di atas katil. Wajahku Nuril pandang lama. Mencari sebarang kesan yang mungkin terpamir dari apa yang aku rasa di dalam hati barangkali.

“Kau okey?” soalan sama yang ditanyakan Amir petang tadi kini diulang pula oleh Nuril.

“Tak.” aku menjawab sepatah. Sayu. Air mata mula bergenang, tidak mampu lagi untuk kutahan.

“Aku tak okey.” aku menambah dan tika itu juga air mata bercucuran menuruni pipiku. Esakan kecil kulepaskan, mengharapkan ianya mampu meringankan berat di kepala juga di hati. Bantal di ribaan kupeluk erat. Nuril yang melihat keaadanku itu terus bangun dari lantai dan naik ke katilku. Bahuku dipeluk dan belakangku digosok perlahan, mengharapkan itu juga mampu sekurang-kurangnya meringankan segala beban yang aku tanggung.

Bubble Talk #3 - After Love : Foreword

After Love : Foreword

After 3 years of my last writing, now, i'm trying again.

The 30th Day (TTD) masih tergantung like how I left it 3 years ago. Ada rasa nak sambung balik but i need to find the draft first and that's where the problems start (-_-)||

Back to [Untitled] After Love, aku finally decide nak tulis cerita melayu. Bare in mind yang cerita ni takkan jadi cerita fluffy sebab, well, aku tak boleh nak tulis anything sweet, all the fluffy stuff dalam bahasa melayu. Awkward yang amat.

And, there will be some eng-malay mix in the conversation dalam cerita ni because that is what i'm comfortable with. pardon me bout that.

Also, i need to clarify this. I used Baek Ji Young's Like Being Shot / Like Being Hit by A Bullet dalam starting [Untitled] After Love, I mentioned there that it is Kim Feel version which was broadcast in early/middle December 2015. Kalau consider the broadcast time, timeline [Untitled] After Love would be quite tak munasabah. So, let's just ignore the real time broadcast, and the unreasonable timeline it might cause, shall we? :)

Peace.

Oh, and here is Kim Feel's version of Like Being Shot. I don't even know why but this version dah jadi pebret aku since first time aku tengok version ni kat KBS hujung tahun lepas. Sharing is caring, Video credit to KBS youtube channel. TQ.


Thursday, July 21, 2016

KyuNee Story (ILWMD - Special Chapters) #4


# Special Chapter : KyuNee Story Episode 4

My heart only has you, your heart only has me
Similar sentiments, the proof of our love
The same sky, different place
We’re separated for now
For this instant, something to never forget
Please remember

Ha Nee’s hand roams through her bag and looks for her phone when she heard the tone ringing. She nearly forgot that was her ringtone since she just change it last night. It takes her awhile before she found it. That’s the problem when you just throw everything you thought you’ll need into your bag. Not even looking at the caller ID, she picked-up the call.

“Yobeosaeyo.” She greets.

“Ha Nee.” The caller called out.

Upon hearing the voice, her lips curved and a smile formed right away. It has been few days since they last talk to each other. She don’t know what is wrong but he seems to avoid her.

“Kyu.” She calls back.

“What are you doing?” he asks.

“Me? I’m on my way home. Why?”

“Do you have any other plan for today?”

“Other than reading the new book I bought yesterday, no, I don’t. Why?”

“Let’s meet. As for the book, just read it tomorrow. I’ll pick you up in 30 minutes. You’ll be home by then, right?”

“I guess so. Where are we going?”

“A place where we can talk. I’ll be there in 30 minutes. Bye.”

With that, he hung-up – leaving Ha Nee dumbfound.

*****

Just like he said, he arrives 30 minutes later – 20 minutes after Ha Nee got home.
Buckling her seatbelt, Ha Nee asks once again.

“Where are we going?”

“To a place you like the most.” He reply.
“And where is that?”

He gives her a smile and reply,

“Just wait a little and you’ll know.”

In about another 30 minutes, Ha Nee already can see where they are heading to. Five minutes later, she’s already standing on the white sand, feeling the breeze and enjoying the wave sound.

She inhale deeply, and let it out with a big smile on her face.

“I miss this salty, fresh air.”

She turns and looks at Kyuhyun who is leaning on the car and gives him another smile.

“So…” she trailed off, looking at Kyuhyun while the guy, looking at her back, raising his brow.

“What’s the ‘occasion’?” she asks.

He chuckle. She knew.

“Care to tell why did you ask that?”

“Well, let’s see. We barely talk since Jungsoo oppa’s birthday, you’re obviously avoiding me since then, and you suddenly call me today – asking me out and bring me here.” She said, counting with her fingers.

“Was it that obvious?” he asks, scratching his head.

“So?” she asks again.

“Let’s have a walk.” He said, taking off his sneakers.

*****

[Ha Nee’s POV]

We’ve been walking without saying anything for more than five minutes. Among all the things in this world, having a walk on the seashore is the best when it comes to things that can calm me. Whenever I was sad or having too much stress, I always went to a beach and have some walks there before I can think straight again. But today, it was different. The breeze that touched my cheeks, the waves that are going through my feet – they didn’t calm me a bit. I don’t even know where did this ‘uneasiness’ came from. Was it because Kyu is here, beside me? Or was it because of the curiousness? He still didn’t tell me why are we here.

I look up at him. I admit, he is one handsome guy. To be honest, he is the most handsome friend I ever have. His eyes, his eyebrows, eyelashes, his nose, his lips – they are all beautiful and all the features fit perfectly. When he smiles, his white teeth will show and that shine his smile more. His bang covers up his forehead, but not too much. His wavy brown hair is not too long, but not shorts either. Just my style. Unknowingly, a smile formed on me and when I realize that, I’m a bit surprised. What am I doing? I shake my head, trying to throw away all the ridiculous thinking.

Suddenly, I hear a chuckle from my side. Once again, I look at him – just to see him looking at me, grinning.

“Why?” I ask him.

Again, he chuckle before giving me a reply.

“I’m quite good looking, aren’t I?” he said, with his smile never leaving his face.

I was caught red-handed. I can feel my cheeks burning.

“Not really.” I reply, with an obviously not honest answer.

And as predicted, he knows. He let out another chuckle.

“Fine. It’s okay. At least it is good enough to tempt your eyes.”

I can feel that my cheeks had turns hotter than earlier. And he really needs to add the fuel on the fire and make it worst by adding,

“Don’t worry. Your blushed cheeks are pretty too.”

I think, my cheeks can’t get any redder than this and I don’t think my heart can beat even faster than how it beats right now.

“You sure are the Evil Kyu.” I said in my breath.

“Did you just say something?” He asks, still teasing me.

“No, I didn’t.” I said, pouting.

Being the ‘Evil Kyu’, I thought he’ll keep teasing me again but, surprisingly, he didn’t. He just keep smiling and enjoying the moment without anymore teases. But, well, ‘enjoying the moment’ is part of being the Evil Kyu too since he enjoy teasing people. He should have coax me instead of laughing at me. And just like he reads my head, he suddenly raises his hand and pats my head. Now, that is unusual and he is giving me goosebumps.

After another few silence moments, the curiosity hits me again. So, I’ve decide to just be the straightforward me and ask him what I want to know. I think he won’t tell me anything if I just wait.
“Kyu.” I call and look up at him. With my bare foot, I sure do need to look up more than usual, eventhough I’m not that short. It just shows how tall he is.

He looks at me, indicating that he’s listening.

“Why are we here?” I ask.

“To have a walk?” he said, but it sounds more like a question to me.

“And what do we need this walk for?”

“Just because…we need to.”

I think he can read the question marks all over my face because I really don’t get what he means.

“Let’s have a sit over there.” He said, and leads me to a dry spot.

We sit there with our shoes on our side. After we settle there, he starts.

“Ha Nee, don’t you think that we are a bit awkward this past few days?" He asks.

“Honestly?” I ask him back.

“Yes. Honestly.” He said.
“Honestly, no. I don’t. I don’t feel awkward at all. Why should I anyway?”

“You didn’t remember?

“Remember what?”

“You don’t remember at all what makes me avoid you?” he asks, in disbelief.

Shaking my head, I give him a questioning look before adding,

“That reminds me. Why did you avoid me?”

He sighs. And I believe I heard him muttering ‘I can’t believe this’ and ‘what’s the point of…’ and he trailed off with some other words that I wasn’t able to catch.

“Kyu…”

“This is so frustrated.” He cuts me off.

“What?” I ask him, confused.

“I’ve wasted a week, meaninglessly.”

“Care to explain?” I ask, still confused.

“I avoided you because I was too…but now, you didn’t even…I shouldn’t have avoide you in the first place.”
“Kyu, I still don’t get it.”

“Ha Nee, do you remember the day we met Minho?”

“Yes, but…”

“Don’t you remember what I said before I punch him?”

And that hits me. After all the chaos, I’ve forgot that line. The ‘I am her boyfriend-to-be’ that makes my heart skip a beat. I never thought that’s what makes him keeping a distance from me.

“Oh. That?” I ask. Still thinking of what to say, and I choose to play safe.

“About that...Kyu, no need to feel awkward. I know you just said that to help me. There’s no need to avoid me just because of that. I won’t misunderstand.” Eventhough that’s what I said, but deep inside me, I want to believe that it’s true. I have to admit that I like him – more than just a friend.

And what he says later makes my heart nearly stop.

“But I meant it.” He said, clear enough for me to hear it.

“Be my girl.” He adds, and that makes my heart really stop.

Or that’s what I thought. If my heart really stops, he might need to bring me to the hospital. But what make me pretty sure that my heart didn’t stop beating is because I can hear my own heartbeat – loudly, when he says,

“Let me be your boyfriend.”

I was so surprised. I’m in shocked that I don’t even realize I was crying – until he wipes the tears with his thumb.

“Can I take this as a yes?” he asks, with his so beautiful smile.

And again, my mind is completely blown because I didn’t even realize that I was hugging him – with my arms over his shoulders. I only realize it when I heard his chuckle and I felt his arms – around my waist.


-END-

KyuNee Story (ILWMD - Special Chapters) #3


# Special Chapter : KyuNee Story Episode 3


Ha Nee looks at him from the corner of her eyes. The guy hasn’t even said a word since they enter the car. If the ride to the mall few hours back was filled with talks and laughs, their way back home is filled with silence. Ha Nee don’t know if she should say something or not. But, this silence choked her. The last word she hear from him was his ‘give me your hand’ half an hour ago.

[Flashback]

“Well. Park Kyuhyun-shi. Are you Ha Nee’s boyfriend or what?” asks Minho.

Kyuhyun give him a smile before answering him.

“No.” he said. His hand curled up into a ball.

“I’m her boyfriend-to-be.” He adds and punched him on his left cheek.

Minho lied on the floor, with some blood on his lower lip.

Ha Nee was shocked. Eventhough she already saw this coming, but she can’t believe that he really did it. People around them start to stop what they are doing and looked at them. Everyone is assuming what is happening. Whispers can be heard from everywhere. But, Kyuhyun doesn’t care a bit. He walked to the guy who is still lying on the floor, moaning in pain. Kyuhyun walks to him and sit beside him.

“That’s for hurting Ha Nee few years back. And this,” he takes out a band aid from the band aid box he’s holding and put it on Minho’s chest before he add,

“is a gratitude, a ‘thank you’ from me for leaving her.” with that, he stand up and walk to Ha Nee. He pulls her hand and takes all the plastic bags on the bench.

“Let’s go.” he said and head to their car.

Arrive at the car, still not letting go of Ha Nee’s hand, he put all the plastic bags at the back seat. After closing the back door, he move to the front seat and open the door before asking Ha Nee to get in.

“Give me your hand.” He suddenly said.

“Huh?” Ha Nee looks at Kyuhyun who is still standing beside her outside the car, confused.

Kyuhyun then just stretch out his hand and take Ha Nee’s left hand before he squats next to her. He takes out a band aid and put it on Ha Nee’s elbow where it was hurt earlier. Done with that, he put her hand on its’ original position and put the seatbelt on her. He then get in the car and after wearing his, he then drove away.

[End of flashback]

Ha Nee glance at Kyuhyun once again.

“Kyu.” she calls.

“Erm…” he answers.

“Are you mad?” she asks.

“No.” he replies.

“Then, what’s with the look?” she asks again, looking at Kyuhyun’s mix expression that she can’t even interpret.

“Don’t worry. I’m fine. It’s just that I’ve…” he stops.

“Forget it.” He said a while later.

And that bring them into silence once again.

*****

[Soo Il’s POV]

I look at Ha Nee and Kyuhyun. The atmosphere is a bit…‘out of place’. It looks like something is wrong between those two. Did they fight? But they are still helping each other like always. But something seems a bit off since they got back from the mall. Who should I ask? Kyu? Ha Nee?

[End of Soo Il’s POV]

“Ha Nee.” Mrs. Park calls the girl. She asks her to taste the dish she’s cooking.

Soo Il then take the chance and approach Kyuhyun.

“What are you doing?” she asks.

Kyuhyun looks at her and raise one of his brows. Using the knife he’s holding, he point at the fishcakes on the cutting board.

“Wrong question.” He replies.

“What do you want?” he asks back.

Soo Il giggle before she add,

“After you are done with the fishcakes, can you accompany me to the bakery?”
“Why? Are you buying a three-tiers cake that you even need my help?” he ask, jokingly.

“That’s not funny.” She said with a stern look but it change into a ‘kitty-eye’ look second after.

“Please…” she begs.

But she was ignored. Kyuhyun keep cutting the fishcakes.

“Kyu…come on. I need someone to hold the cake while I drive.”

“Or someone to drive while I hold the cake.” She adds.

“Just put the cake on the passenger seat and make sure it wears the seatbelt. Everything is going to be fine.” he said.

“Kyu!!!” she said while giving him a light punch on his shoulder.

“What?” he asks, laughing.

“Kyu…please?” she asks again.

Looking at her, he sighs.

“Are you sure there’s no other means behind this?”

She shakes her head, smiling.

“Promise.” She said, making a peace sign with her finger.

*****

“So, what’s going on?”

“Kim Soo Il, we’ve only been in the car for two minutes.”

“I can’t wait any longer.”  She said, reasoning herself.

“And you’ve promised me that I’m going solely for the sake of accompanying you who is so afraid that the cake will get into ‘accident’.”

“Yeah, you’re accompanying me. But, it’ll be too bored if we just stay silent, right? We need to talk along the way. And this is the biggest issue right now. So, let’s talk about this.”

He sighs.

“Today is hyung’s birthday. A special day of your loves one. You’re busy making today a perfect day. I don’t want to trouble you.”

“And you’re his brother. It won’t be perfect if not everyone is happy. Plus, you’re a friend that I love too. Kyu, you’re the one who gives me advises when I’m in need. Now, let me at least repay some.” She said, looking at him.

“There’s nothing going on, to be honest.”

“Then what’s with the atmosphere between you two? You both didn’t say even a single word to each other since you got back from the mall. Something happened there? Did you fight?”

“No, we didn’t.” again, he sighs.

Soo Il just wait till Kyuhyun want to let it all out. She doesn’t want to put more pressure on him. About one minute later, Kyuhyun give up. He needs to talk about it with someone.

“We met Minho at the mall.” He starts.

“Minho?” she asks, then realizes who did Kyuhyun actually means.

“MINHO?!! You mean Choi Minho?”
“Yes. Choi Minho, Ha Nee’s ex-boyfriend.”

“And?”

“I punched him.”

“Seriously?! Why? Wait. Did that jerk do something to Ha Nee? I saw a band aid on her elbow earlier.”

Kyuhyun let out a small laugh.

“Cool down, Soo Il. They’re just talking…I guess.” He said, unsure, when he remembers that Ha Nee was going to slap that guy earlier.

Do not want to trouble Soo Il, he decide to not tell her that. He then add,

“Her elbow was hurt because she fell down while looking for the seaweed.” He chuckle.

“Ooh…so, you punch him. Then what? I’m sure that it’s not because of the punch that you two become that awkward.”

“Yeah. It’s not because of the punch. It’s because of what I said before the punch.” He paused, then adds,

“Actually, I don’t know what’s going on between the two at the moment because I wasn’t there. I was buying the band aid for Ha Nee and when I went back at where I leave her, he’s already there. I don’t know what they’re talking about but Ha Nee looks angry. So I approached her right away. After we introduce ourselves, I know right away that he’s Ha Nee’s ex. And this Minho guy suddenly asks me if I’m Ha Nee’s boyfriend.”

“Kyaa…oh my, this is so exciting. What did you answer him?” Soo Il suddenly screams and asks excitedly.

“Yah!! We’re in the serious mode right now.” Kyuhyun said before he laughs, followed by Soo Il.

“Whatever mode it was, I’m just too excited to stay silent. What’s your answer? Did you say yes? Is that why you two are awkward?”

Kyuhyun laughs at Soo Il’s act.

“How did hyung control you? You’re just too loud.” He said and let out another laughs.

“We didn’t control each other. We just do what we want.” Soo Il said, giving him a fast answer, and add,

“Now, let’s back to today’s event. What’s your answer?”

“I said no. Bu…”

“You said no?! You should’ve say ‘yes’. That’s the chance.” Soo Il cuts in.

“Chance? What chance?”

“Confession, of course.”

“What confession?”

Soo Il rolled her eyes at the question.

“You like her…no, no. Let me change the question. You love her, don’t you?”

Kyuhyun choked his own saliva. He coughs and clears his throat.

“So, I was right?” Soo Il ask with a big grin on her face.

“How did you…”

“I know?” she chuckle.

“I’ve been monitoring you guys, you know. Never mind about that. The point is, I know. Now, let’s talk about you. Since you said ‘no’, so it wasn’t because of a confession. Then, what was it?”

“You should have listened till a finish my line earlier. When he asked me that, I said ‘no’ but right before I punch him, I said, ‘I’m her boyfriend-to-be’ and punch his face.”

“Wow. That’s cool.”

“But I shouldn’t have said that. Now, how am I going to face her?”

Soo Il suddenly laugh out loud.
“Yah, is this the person who persuade Park Jungsoo to confess to me? Is that really you, Park Kyuhyun?”

Soo Il stops laughing and add,

“According to your hyung, there was once, after we met again, you gave him another round of advices. And you said, if it’s you, if you like the girl, you’ll just go to her and tell her that you like her right there and then.”

“But it’s not that easy. Hyung was right. It’s not that easy.”

“Haha…Jungsoo oppa said this once. If one day, Kyuhyun happened to tell me that he don’t know how to confess to Ha Nee, I really want to say this to him, ‘are you going to only look at her from afar for the rest of your life?’.” She imitates Jungsoo and laugh.
Kyuhyun chuckle. He remembers saying those words to his brother not long ago.

“Pull your strength Kyu. I know you can do it. And I’m pretty sure that you’ll get a positive answer.” She smile at her own thought.
“And how do you know that?”

“I’ve told you. I’ve been monitoring you two.”

Soo Il looks at Kyuhyun. She needs to help them. She needs to repay them. They had helped her and Jungsoo a lot.

“Kyu!!!” she suddenly shouts.

“What?” ask Kyuhyun, shocked.

“We’ve missed the bakery.” She said, pointing at the bakery they’ve just passed on their left.

Laughing, Kyuhyun reply,


“We just have to make a turn, Soo Il. No need to get that anxious.”